City Watch NEWS Going Out of Business

Written by John Face

April 1, 2022

City Watch has decided to end its local reporting. “The heavy responsibility of telling lies” is what Editor John Face stated was one of many reasons to close its door. City Watch was created in November of 2002 in response to the great Albion Flood crisis.

The news organization has since gone on to win several awards for its coverage of local NEWS including the prestigious Putzer Prize in which local politicians were shown to be honest hard-working individuals not wanting anything for their work.

Face noted in an interview this morning that sometimes he has to do what is best for himself and the community so that is why he steps away. He is looking to hand over the reins of his organization to someone who is willing to tell lies but found that most of those people are tied up in other news agencies such as The Recorder located in Albion.

City Watch NEWS is doing this for the first time and if you make it this far believing that we are closing our doors or any of this is true, oh my God you really are gullible. It’s April Fools silly, all this is a lie. City Watch is going nowhere.

Please note this is satire and everything in this is a joke and not true.